Mindy Memories

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Possible workplace rivalry?

There are two women who work for one of the agents at work and I get the feeling there is some rivalry there. I believe they are both part-time, one is a young intern, the other is in her 40s, I think. I get along well with both Both are very pretty and very friendly. However, I get the feeling that the older one maybe wants more of what the younger one is doing. I'm not really sure as I don't always work directly with them so don't really know. I get the impression from the older one that the younger one is very flighty and doesn't know what she's doing and only has the job because she's cute. However, that's not the impression I get from the younger one, who has never said anything bad about the older one to me. Yes, I think the younger one (from now on called A) is learning a lot. You don't come into your first office job automatically knowing the best way to organize yourself, follow- up with people, etc. You learn by doing and by hoping those more experienced than you show you some things and you eventually learn what works for you and what doesn't. I get the feeling that the older one (now called B) isn't really showing A how to do these things, just telling her that she must do them and getting upset when she doesn't do everything right. It's like telling a kid to go clean his room and make it spotless when you've never shown him how.

So, I guess I'll find out because I'm going to be working quite a bit with A in the coming months. She is a very sweet girl and I hope everything works out well. I also think that some of the problem is that B wants to do some of what A is doing, and since A is only there three times a week B sometimes edges in on A's work. Now, that may be coming from the boss who wants information and A isn't there, so he asks B. From the meeting I was in yesterday though, he wants A to be the assistant to run with me on this project, so I shouldn't be dealing with B on this at all. I just get uncomfortable when B says bad things to me about A. I don't agree or disagree, just kinda listen. I'm not going to get involved in these things as I like both of them. They just have very different personalities.

In the end, part of me thinks the reason for the whole thing is that B doesn't like being on the same level as a much younger woman. I've had to deal with this before and it can be very hurtful. A woman who was a good friend of mine and old enough to be my mom started getting nasty with me when we both went to work at the same place. We has met at one job but were more or less equals. At the new place I was above her and had an office while she had a cubicle. After that, she just was roundabout nasty, if that makes sense. It wasn't usually to my face, but every time she asked me something she'd go ask my boss the same question to check up on me. If she asked me a question and I said, "I don't know. I'll find out," she didn't like that and acted like I was purposefully keeping information from her. Why the hell would I do that? I wanted her to have info so that she could do her job. I just don't like making up stuff and don't have an ego problem with saying that I don't know and I'll find out. In the end, she ended up quitting in a huff, more because of my boss than me, and that was the end of our friendship. It was hurtful to realize that as soon as I had some success in my life she couldn't handle being my friend because I was younger and had a higher position.

Anyway, we'll see what happens. I have the feeling the truth is somewhere in the middle on this one.


  • At 11:17 AM, Blogger Dianne said…

    I guess it kinda sucks being in your 40s and having to do the same job as someone almost half your age. But you do have to 'get over it' and do your job the best way you know how. Everyone should be treated as equals in the workplace, but it usually doesn't happen as you have described. The older co-worker is having too much to say because she must feel threatened by the younger woman. Too bad. Do your job and zip it! : )


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