Sigh. Just don't know what's wrong with me lately
I didn't go to work today because I went to bed and woke up feeling dreadful. I think my TMJ kicked in because my head was pounding. I barely have enough sick time left after the back problem a few weeks ago and taking a day off after that lovely fall a little after that, but I think I have just enough to cover me. Doesn't really matter, I couldn't have done anything at work today, anyway.
I wanted to watch the Oscars last night, but went to bed while watching them and was in and out of sleep. I did see No County for Old Men win at the end, and was happy about that. So, I slept until about 4PM this afternoon and feel more like myself.
The problem is that I'm still in a bit of a funk. I had a great time over Pres' Day weekend, visiting my sister and getting away. Of course, as soon as I got back I got back into my same routine. I'm trying not to act any differently and actually hung out with friends all day Saturday and saw There Will Be Blood and saw Atonement on my own on Sunday morning when I still feeling OK. However, when I'm by myself I just want to cry. I don't know why, really. I mean, my life really isn't that bad and except for my recent klutziness and health issues things are fine. I'd say it was the weather, but the weather really hasn't been that bad, either. I either sleep too much or not enough lately. I don't know what's wrong with me but it's starting to get old. I don't want my health and klutziness to start affecting my job.
So, I'm feeling better and will go to work tomorrow and act like everything is fine and just laugh everything off like I usually do. I'm getting tired of laughing it off, though. But it's not like I can just go off one people at work (which I don't want to do anyway, and have no right to do) or go into some sort of crying jag because some little thing will set me off. Then they'll REALLY think I have problems and next thing I know I'll be a client instead of an employee, lol.
(See, there I go, laughing at it again. I guess I'm just not good showing my emotions and use humor to cover them. I don't know how to not do that.)
Meh, I'll get over it, but just had to get it out.
I wanted to watch the Oscars last night, but went to bed while watching them and was in and out of sleep. I did see No County for Old Men win at the end, and was happy about that. So, I slept until about 4PM this afternoon and feel more like myself.
The problem is that I'm still in a bit of a funk. I had a great time over Pres' Day weekend, visiting my sister and getting away. Of course, as soon as I got back I got back into my same routine. I'm trying not to act any differently and actually hung out with friends all day Saturday and saw There Will Be Blood and saw Atonement on my own on Sunday morning when I still feeling OK. However, when I'm by myself I just want to cry. I don't know why, really. I mean, my life really isn't that bad and except for my recent klutziness and health issues things are fine. I'd say it was the weather, but the weather really hasn't been that bad, either. I either sleep too much or not enough lately. I don't know what's wrong with me but it's starting to get old. I don't want my health and klutziness to start affecting my job.
So, I'm feeling better and will go to work tomorrow and act like everything is fine and just laugh everything off like I usually do. I'm getting tired of laughing it off, though. But it's not like I can just go off one people at work (which I don't want to do anyway, and have no right to do) or go into some sort of crying jag because some little thing will set me off. Then they'll REALLY think I have problems and next thing I know I'll be a client instead of an employee, lol.
(See, there I go, laughing at it again. I guess I'm just not good showing my emotions and use humor to cover them. I don't know how to not do that.)
Meh, I'll get over it, but just had to get it out.
2 Comments:
At 8:59 AM,
Jennifer said…
It might be time to go to the doctor and see if there's anything that can be done. A friend of mine struggled with symptoms much the same as yours and her doctor put her on Wellbutrin for a few months. It was just what she needed to get her through some depression, so it might be something worth looking into. I don't always think pills are the answer, but sometimes your brain chemistry needs a little kickstart.
Hang in there!
At 11:51 PM,
Anonymous said…
My hormones started getting a little funky in my late 30s and still are! I think you could have the winter blahs too. Try to get as much sunlight and fresh air as you can.
How did you like the movies?
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